Thoughts That Sway

I walked through the meadows
With thoughts wavering,
Like the swinging grass
Touched by the breeze.
I'm amazed how conveniently
His thoughts fill me up,
From how much he
Lauds my presence in his life,
To how ingenuine, at times,
Those words
Of praise feel.
I abandon his world
For a breath of fresh air.
The water droplets on
The tree leaves,
Appear like pearls
In hues of green.
I wish I could
Trade those old memories
For some new ones.
It doesn't die out,
The affection, the adoration.
But, it sure makes me question,
Wasn't holding back
The plan?
First showers of the season,
Touch the ground
Passing through
My transparent soul.
I stand still,
Let it soak me
With positivity,
Charging me up
For a new reason.
Suddenly, I'm new.
I can't stop loving,
No, I won't
'Cause that is all
My heart beholds.

Kite

Many a business
they know, but
this, no lazy hand's
clumsy job.
Agreed, my existence is
a creative man's
exuberant idea.
He glues me
in shades of his delight.
He ties me down
to control my flight.
I befriend the wind,
it knows the secrets
I hide in my heart.
The sun gawks at my
strength, my agility.
I look in its eyes
and display
a harmless demeanour.
On the flip side,
snap and I'm on my own.
Sure, it hurts.
Isn't it the same
with you, human beings?
You learn your potential
after a snap.
For that one time,
I landed in the hands of
the most positive man alive.
He rose me to heights,
I had not known afore.
Those careful gentle releases
he gave,
the beam on his face, and
the glint in his eyes
told me he felt
he was flying with me
in the sky.
I flew free,
I breathed free
I decided it's my forte
I want to fly,
for it gives a perspective
like no other.

Butterfly

She crossed my path once,

She crossed my path twice.

In utter desperation,

To hold her,

I brought my swollen fingers

Out of my pocket.

Not having seen so many

Colours at once for years,

Caught me off guard.

Mesmerised me,

Believed there existed

Only black and white.

Every time she came near,

My soul breathed in her smell.

It felt familiar.

Not having seen my beloved

All these years,

I asked for her.

They spoke of nothing

No signs of my beloved.

I was losing my breath,

For something I had lost,

When my vision gave up.

Then...

She danced around me again,

From one shoulder to another,

Caressing my chest,

Playing with my hair,

Kissing my nose,

I tried not to scare her.

My mother once explained,

‘When someone dear to you dies,

They become a butterfly and

Be with you.’

My heart skipped a beat,

There she was

Resting on my hand.

And I...

I wish I could pause these moments,

For she has never looked this beautiful.

Ten years from now...

I'm very fond of playing this game called 'ask me something'. I like the randomness of questions. Some three  years back, someone had asked me, "where do you see yourself ten years from now?", when we played this game. I did not have any answer and I said, "what a crap question, ask me something else." Well! The game obviously went on but that question remained unanswered until last night.
Ten years from now...
I'll be a writer people won't swear by but they'd still like to sit back reading me peacefully. I'll be someone who's words would touch those areas of people's heart that have been kept in separation from the rest. I'll be a poet people would silently relate to. I'll be a satisfied person thanking my God every passing second for making me ME.
Ten years from now...
I'll be a mother and a wife. I'll wake up every morning only to crawl back into my man's arms to put the final fullstop to my sleep. I'll spoil my child with all my heart. I'll take my child for a ride when it rains heavily and we'll sneeze together. And even after years, I'll be my man's fantasy from the moment his day starts till the time it ends. I'll make sure my family gets the best 'cause come what may, we'll stand together.
Ten years from now...
I'll plan a get together with my school and college friends and let my family be on its own for a change. That day would be the day filled with gossip, lots of teasing, clicking and so much more. I'd be what I was when I was a teenager.
Ten years from now...
I'll sit down in front of my laptop on a holiday emailing a dear friend about all what's happening in my life.
Ten years from now...
I'll dig into my memory bag to find some cute, fun-filled pictures of a dreamy-eyed 25-year-old me with my pack of loved ones. I'll share those pictures again. I'll mail them to those who are in the pictures.
Ten years from now...
I'll show my child the little library I maintained throughout my growing up years. I'll tell my child that it's one way she or he can know what their mother has been like, what she liked reading and what words she enjoyed.
Ten years from now...
I'll just call up my parents one day and tell them how grateful I am to be their daughter, how touched I am everytime I think about what all they've done for me all these years. I'll ask them to pray that I'm able to give my bundle of joy the kind of upbringing they gave me.
Ten years from now...
I'll travel a lot. I'll make sure I see different places, meet different people and try different dishes.
Ten years from now...
I'll just read this post and smile at what all I'll be able to strike out and all the things undone.

Perfect imperfection

Today I stand sure
of my views and my thoughts,
I may not know them full but yes,
I know of the sauce
they are made up of.
Not tough to understand
not easy to grab
Like cheeseballs
that melt at the heat of an event.
Their ego walks ahead of them,
and they wont accept it.
They can't prioritise
and they wont admit it.
They don't know how to explain
and they'd tell you...
you lack vision.
When they throw their weight around,
you have to take it
but if you snub them more than once
they'd turn to puppies
in no time at all.
Their sadness is well justified
your tears are a part of the scheme.
Their silence should be taken as positive
but your silence would be absolutely killing.
Their plans are heavenly,
your plans are nearly a nightmare!
Yet, you'd be the object of his affection
and he'd be yours.
I, sometimes, dare to ask myself
if I like a man?
Normal to the being,
I nod my head, but,
a second thought shakes me
and I let the smile
convey the deepest me.

'Cause when I'm alone, I'm me

I roamed the streets, the bylanes
the less polluted, the more populated
complex and the obvious
insecure and the certain
Lost friends, got some.
There was happiness
there was criticism
there was praise
there was sadness
there was drama
there was boredom.
Sometimes, I played safe
and sometimes I was just
off the cliff badly bruised
but life intact.
Misunderstandings became a part
and I only got immune.
From obese feelings
to malnourished thoughts
I garnered all.
My being is different
when in full view,
I witness a changed person
someone fake
someone fighting for breath
someone not delighted.
And then I find
peace, bliss
'cause when I'm alone
I'm me.

How much is too much?

How much is too much
when a she feels it right
to befriend a he?
How much is too much
when she hesitates
giving words to her feelings?
How much is too much
when she finds it right
to keep family above he?
How much is too much
when she cares about he
and he never bothers to
guess the least?
How much is too much
when life around begins to change
and she tries to find peace in he?
How much is too much
when she starts to
share her personal space with he?
How much is too much
if nothing happens
the way he thought,
the way she thought?
How much is too much
when she misbehaves
with he out of exasperation?
How much is too much
when the limits
are revised and relations renewed
in a new light?
How much is too much?